


New Beginnings

by Pixie (Ayiana)



Category: JAG
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-05-15
Updated: 2005-05-15
Packaged: 2017-10-06 10:58:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/52958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ayiana/pseuds/Pixie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A self-indulgent flight-of-fancy. Set after the coin toss at McMurphy's.</p>
            </blockquote>





	New Beginnings

They stepped inside and Harm turned to close the door, latching it with a soft click of finality. They'd stayed at McMurphy's until Joanna had literally chased them out with the broom, threatening to put them to work if they didn't get out from underfoot. Now they stood in the darkened apartment, surrounded by cardboard boxes that loomed eerily from the shadows, and Mac had to resist the urge to pinch herself.

Three days ago, her life had been on a relatively even keel. She'd known what she was doing in the morning, known how she'd spend her day, and known where she'd sleep at night. She'd had a stack of case files on her desk, and the confidence to handle them with grace and skill. She'd had friends she adored, a home that brought her peace, and a life that made her reasonably happy. Now, as she gazed around at the hulking shadows of packing crates and draped furniture, she suddenly felt a sense of vertigo, as though she'd crested the top of the highest peak on the highest roller coaster in the world, and was plunging down into…what?

His arms came around her from behind, wrapping her tightly in solid comfort, and she relaxed instinctively. She didn't know what was at the bottom of the hill, but she knew she'd never again have to face that unknown alone. She turned into him and wrapped her arms around his waist, holding on for dear life.

********

Harm held her close against him, this treasure that had been granted to him by fate and luck, and a last minute decision to throw caution to the winds. He tucked her head under his chin and stared around the ghostly apartment, memories assailing him from all sides. Mac, staring out of the window with tears streaming down her face. Mac, accusing him of only showing interest when she had one foot out the door. Mac, laughing at him as they scrambled for a dropped coin, and then flirting with him when they bumped heads under the table. What was it she'd said? He thought about it for a moment, and when the memory came flooding back, he smiled against the silk of her hair. "Don't be gentle," she'd said teasingly. "Be good."

This room held their spirits. It always would. Years from now they'd bring their kids back to show them where they'd lived and worked when they'd first met, and the memories would still be here waiting for them. He and Mac would look at each other and smile, and remember the night the walls had crumbled. Their kids would see the exchange and roll their eyes. Grown ups were such strange animals.

********

Mac stirred and looked up at him, catching him with a mysterious half smile on his lips.

"What's so funny?" she asked, her heart giving a little hop skip in her chest at the love she saw in his eyes.

"I was just… thinking."

"About?"

He shrugged, a little self-conscious. "You'll laugh."

"Harm… Give."

His eyes glinted at her in the darkness, amusement crinkling the corners in the way that always made her want to smile right along with him.

"I was picturing bringing our kids back here some day," he said.

"And that amused you?"

He shook his head slightly. "Not so much the bringing them back here, though I'd like to show them where we met. I just had this off beat mental image of a dark-haired adolescent rolling his eyes at us while we trade sappy smiles."

Mac did her best to look stern. "Harm. Marines don't get sappy. We get sweaty, and muddy, and sometimes even bloody…but we never get sappy."

He grinned at her. "Whatever you say, Mac."

She snuggled back into him, tucking her smile away in the crisp folds of his uniform jacket.

********

Someone once said that life is change. The seasons come and go, months flowing into each other and out again in the endless river of time. People come into your life, touch your heart, and drift out again, leaving you changed by their presence, a piece of their soul forever connected to a piece of yours. Instinctively Harm tightened his hold on the woman in his arms. Nobody had ever or, he was convinced, would ever, touch his soul the way she did.

Outside, a horn blared. Cars passed. People lived their lives oblivious to the cataclysmic events that had changed his life forever. A few short hours ago, the woman in his arms was just Mac – friend, colleague, frustratingly unattainable and heartbreakingly beautiful. Now she was Mac – fiancée, lover … his. This change - this magical metamorphosis from half formed hopes and dreams to together - stunned him in its perfect simplicity. Why, he wondered, had they fought it for so long?

********

Mac listened to the steady thud of his heartbeat beneath her ear. She felt his breath fan the hair at her temple, and knew that whatever the future brought, they'd face it together. Careers and living arrangements would sort themselves out. For her part, she'd be perfectly content if the rest of the world would just go away for a while and leave them alone in this place of perfect happiness.

She smoothed a hand across his chest. This man was her entire world. He was her strength, her comfort, the other half of her soul. For years they'd fought their mutual attraction, and she shook her head a little at the absurdity of it all. So much wasted time, so many missed opportunities.

"Hey," he said quietly. "You okay?"

She tilted her head to smile up at him, her cheek brushing against the fabric of his jacket. "Never been better," she said.

"No regrets?"

"None." She pulled back a little and met his eyes. "You?"

"No." He whispered the single word as his lips settled on hers.

Fate's seamstress had chosen. In a single brilliant flash of light on gold, she'd neatly snipped short a career, using its length to stitch together the delicate beginnings of a shared life. Unfortunately, the wheels of government were somewhat less efficient. It could take weeks or even months to process a resignation, especially for a high ranking officer during a time of war. The military never released its own without a fight. And so, in the bright light of morning, movers would arrive at both of their apartments. Mac would be spirited away to San Diego to set up her command, and Harm would be off to London to find his way around a strange new world where cookies were called biscuits, money was counted in pounds, and people ate tea for dinner.

They were left with tonight - one night in which to seal the promises and cement their love into a force strong enough to withstand the ravages of distance and the siren's song of success.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and allowed her eyes to drift closed, immersing herself completely in the feel of his lips upon hers as they nibbled, tasted, and explored - every moment a treasure, every sigh a promise.

********

He felt her relax against him, the softness of her slim body melting into the firm strength of his with absolute trust. He tightened his hold on her, molding the shape of her spine and hips with lean fingers as he memorized the sweet intoxication of her kiss. She moaned softly, the sound almost a purr in the back of her throat, and he deepened the kiss in response, suddenly desperate to know all of her, to be as close to her as it was ever possible for two people to be.

The world beyond the moment ceased to exist. There was only the softness of her skin beneath his fingers, the sweet stirrings of her breath against his face, and the driving need to know all there was to know of this woman who had captured his heart and would forever hold his soul.

He pulled back and waited for her eyes to flutter open, absurdly pleased at the soft light that seemed to glow behind them. He wanted her to stay with him tonight, wanted to hold her in his arms until the sunrise forced them to acknowledge that they could only hold the world at bay for so long before it forced itself rudely back into their lives.

********

She saw the question in his eyes, read its meaning in the way he molded her body with his hands, and reached to slide his uniform jacket from his shoulders with a gentle smile. Muscles rippled beneath her palms, and she heard his swift intake of breath as she reached for the top button of his shirt. Their eyes met and held as she worked her way down the long row of buttons, the tension building as each one slipped silently free. She stopped once, when she ran into the barrier of his formal cummerbund. She glared balefully at it, offended by its presence, and Harm grinned, reaching behind his back and releasing the bright strip of fabric with a quick flick of his fingers.

"Thanks," she murmured.

He kissed the tip of her nose. "Anytime."

She smiled up at him and resumed her work on the buttons, pulling his shirt free so that she could reach the last few. Then she waited while he unbuttoned his cuffs, her hands resting quietly against the strong wall of his chest, absorbing the steady beat of his heart while he kissed her. She felt him shrug it off his shoulders, and when his arms came back around her and she felt his bare skin slide across her own naked shoulders, she didn't bother to restrain her low moan of pleasure.

********

The sound she made, somewhere between a gasp and a moan, galvanized him. All at once, desire overrode tenderness, and he slid the slim straps of her gown off her shoulders, tasting the exposed skin as he reached behind her for the zipper.

"Harm." Her breath whispered across his chest, sending an answering shiver through his body, as he lifted his head to look down at her.

"Hmm?"

She stepped away from him, holding out her hand for his with a smile that made his pulse race. "Come with me."

Her small hand felt so perfect in his, and he lifted it to his lips, kissing the fingers one by one while he held her eyes with his own.

********

Mac felt her breath catch in her throat as the sense of unreality settled over her again. Nine years she'd known this man. Nine years of wishing and hoping and dreaming – of giving up, and giving in, and moving on - only to come back to what she knew, had probably always known, was her destiny. She watched his dark head bent over her hand and thought that she'd never seen anything more beautiful in her life.

At her gentle tug, his head came up, and she smiled as she led him up the steps, her eyes locked on his. They came to a stop beside the bed, and she tilted her head to meet yet another of his drugging kisses, knowing that if she lived to be a hundred she'd never grow tired of the feel of his lips against her own.

She felt him reach for the zipper at the back of her dress, heard the faint sound it made as it slid open, and abandoned herself to her future.

********

A long time later, he held her in his arms, her head nestled on his shoulder and her arm resting heavily across his chest. Contentment surrounded them like a warm blanket, and he tilted his head so that he could place the gentlest of kisses on top of her shining hair. He felt her smile against his chest in answer and pulled her more snugly against him. God. He didn't know how he was going to survive without her for an hour, much less for weeks or even months while they waited for the slow moving wheels of bureaucracy to set them free. He could only exist in the now, could only think about the moment, about the wonder of having her in his arms.

They would make it. Their foundation was strong. Nine years of shared experiences, of knowing they could trust each other with their very lives, wouldn't desert them now. He knew that, but having only had her for a few short hours, the thought of letting her go sent a shaft of pain and frustration through his heart.

She must have sensed something, because she twisted in his arms to look up at him.

"What is it?" she asked.

He shrugged a little self-consciously. "I don't want to let you go."

She smiled sadly. "And I don't want to go."

********

The intensity of his gaze communicated the depth of his love more than any words ever could, and she reached to sculpt his face with her palm.

"I love you, you know."

He smiled crookedly at her. "I'd hoped as much."

"We'll make it through this." She was trying to convince herself as much as him, and he hugged her quickly.

"Of course we will," he said, and the confidence in his voice reassured her.

It hadn't always been easy; there'd been plenty of heartache and anger, pain and misdirection, but through it all they'd forged a bond that would see them through the weeks to come. She knew that, knew it with absolute certainty – and yet she also knew that once having found their way to each other, the time apart was going to be pure agony.

She struggled to smile.

********

"Hey," he said, wiping away the single tear that trickled down her cheek. "Wasn't it you who said Marines don't cry?"

"And it was you who said everybody cried," she shot back with a weak grin.

His expression turned rueful, "You know, Mac. Sometimes I wish your memory wasn't quite so sharp."

He kissed away the salt of her tears, but when he felt the gentle touch of her hand on his chest and heard the soft intake of her breath, he abandoned comfort in favor of love and allowed its tide to carry them away once again.

********

Mac awoke when the first faint graying of darkness heralded the arrival of the coming day. She stretched, amused when his arm tightened around her automatically.

"Harm," she said, hating to wake him. "It's time."

He opened one eye, peering blearily at her in the dim light. "No."

She laughed gently, "'fraid so, Sailor."

He sighed, rolled over, and sat up, glaring at the clock on the nightstand as though it were personally to blame for his present circumstances.

"Do you want a shower before you go?"

She nodded. "If it's okay."

"Of course it's okay. I'll get you a towel."

He threw back the covers and padded across the room to one of the few remaining unsealed boxes. Pulling out a thick towel and a face cloth, he handed them to her.

"Need any help?" His expression was adorably hopeful, and she laughed as she pulled his head down for her kiss.

********

An hour later they stood together by the door. The dim gray light of early morning filtered through the windows and fell on the deep red of her dress. She was drop dead gorgeous, and he still couldn't believe she was finally his. He ran a gentle finger down the soft slope of her cheek, following it with his lips, desperate to savor this one final moment before what could prove to be months of separation.

"Thank God for email," she said, when he pulled reluctantly away.

"And telephones, and weekend leave…"

She laughed a little at that. "Harm. It's a ten and a half hour flight. You'd almost have to turn around before you landed."

He rubbed his thumb along the line of her lower lip, his eyes serious. "It'd be worth it as long as I got the chance to kiss you first."

She blushed and ducked her head, and he wrapped his arms around her one more time -one more memory to store in a safe place, one more experience to treasure in the days and weeks to come.

She lifted her head and started to say something, but her words were drowned out by the sudden ring of the telephone. He felt her stiffen a little in startled surprise and gave her a quick reassuring squeeze before stepping away to grab the handset.

********

She glared at the offending bit of plastic in Harm's hand, resenting its rude intrusion into her few remaining precious moments with him. He shrugged apologetically as he hit the button to activate the call.

"If this is a telemarketer, you'd better have a will," he said. Mac stifled a laugh. Apparently, Harm wasn't any more thrilled with the interruption than she was.

"General Cresswell! Yes, Sir. I'm sorry, Sir. I just wasn't expecting…"

Mac stared at Harm, eyebrows raised. The general? She stepped across to him, laying a hand on his arm, and received a shrug of the shoulder and a puzzled look in reply. She listened to the one sided conversation, her confusion growing.

"Yes, Sir. She's here." A pause, and then. "No Sir. She was just leaving. She's supposed to meet the movers in a couple of hours."

Another pause.

"Andrews. 0930 hours."

Mac stifled the urge to scream. What in the world was going on? Apparently, the general was explaining something, because there were several interminable seconds of silence on Harm's part.

Finally… "Yes, Sir. I understand. I'll take care of it, Sir."

She watched while he ended the call and slowly replaced the phone on its base. When he turned back to her, his lips twitched suspiciously.

"What?" She practically screamed the word at him, and he laughed, sweeping her into a hug.

"Well," he said, when he'd placed her back on her feet. "There's good news and bad news."

Mac folded her arms and glared at him, and he raised his hands in mock defense. "Okay, okay! The bad news is that he didn't call to give us a miracle. We still have to report to our duty stations, and we still have to go through normal channels for decommissioning."

"But…" She resisted the urge to tap her foot. The suspense was about to kill her.

"But…" He broke into a wide grin. "He managed to get us 3 days leave before we have to report for duty. He said to consider it an engagement gift."

********

He watched the smile spread across her face just before she launched herself into his arms. Catching her easily, he buried his face in the fragrant warmth of her neck, his own smile wide, happy, and relaxed. They'd been granted a reprieve. Three days wasn't much, but he'd take whatever he could get. As she snuggled into him, he hugged her tightly, still a little stunned at the general's kindness. The older man had even gone so far as to contact the movers for them. Now, there was nothing for them to do but enjoy each other's company for three glorious days.

She finally pulled back and looked up at him, her eyes sparkling. "So… No duty station to report to, no plane to catch… Whatever should we do with ourselves?"

He tilted his head to one side and offered a devilish grin in reply. "Oh, I imagine we can come up with a few ideas." And without waiting for her answering smile, he swooped in to capture her lips with his.


End file.
